That Little Flame

I watched Lawrence of Arabia four nights ago, but it's taken me that long to figure out how to blog about it. I started the movie just knowing there would be something deep and profound that would jump out at me and make me want to start typing immediately. That didn't happen. I was really conflicted - the only things I could think of were either too small to matter that much, or too big for me to condense here. I think I finally found a way to tie the movie together along the same strain as the other movies I've talked about here.

T.E. Lawrence was a British officer stationed in Cairo during WWI, while the British were fighting the Turks in Arabia while the French and Russians were fighting the Russians in Europe. He was assigned to Arabia to find prominent Arab leaders and determine their long-term goals in the region. (In other words, the British wanted to know what resistance they would face when they claimed Arabia as their own, those naughty imperialists.) Well, the Arabs just wanted the Turks out of their country so that they could live peacefully. Lawrence quickly assumed a major role in Arab independence, made it a passion of his, and discovered that he was pretty dang good at what he did. With Lawrence's aid and strategy, Arab forces were able to take Turkish held cities and territories, and bomb the railroads so that their entire transportation system was regularly thrown out of whack. (Many hold that Lawrence was an important contributing factow in the development of the insurgency warfare that some Arab group so prominently employ today.)

But through all of this, one simply has to wonder why he did it at all? Why was this such a passion of his?

I think one explanation can be found in lyrics from a song from the Tony award-winning musical Avenue Q (which features such classics as "Everyone's A Little Bit Racist," "It Sucks to Be Me," and "The Internet is for Porn").

Purpose, it's that little flame that lights a fire under your ass.
Purpose, it keeps you going strong, like a car with a full tank of gas.

Helping the Arabs fight for their independence from the Turks was Lawrence's Purpose. It's what he wanted to do and he had all the skills and motivation to do it, so he did it. He knew it was what he was meant to do, he knew that in this particular area he was somewhat extraordinary, so he did it with everything he had to give.

He went through pain and suffering on the way, though. From the scorching deserts to the persecution of his fellow officers who thought he went a little crazy ("What?" they thought,"He wears their clothing and actually treats them as equals? Absurd!"). From the pains of warfare to, at one point, being taken captive by Turks and subsequently beaten, whipped, and raped. Why would someone put up with all of this? Just to fulfill this Purpose?

Because there's another aspect to this Purpose thing, something that comes from Lawrence himself. He would put out matches with his thumb and forefinger, and upon being told by one who tried it himself, "It damn well hurts!" Lawrence casually responded, "Certainly it hurts. The trick is not minding that it hurts." He went through all the painful stuff because he had to in order to do what he was meant to do. Eventually though, it did get to him - he no longer wanted to be extraordinary, he just wanted to go home. Of course, he couldn't do that, he had to finish the job he started. And here's where things go a little fuzzy. Is he only staying out of his arrogance and pride? Has he gone a little insane? Or a little bloodthirsty? What effect would he really have, given England's aspirations of colonization?

Let us now shift with almost no transition to a discussion of Jesus.

He came here to save us. To forgive us and to teach us. And he went through death so that he could fulfill that Purpose. The apostles were meant to spread the good news about Jesus, but they had to put up with jail and persecution and execution to do it. Because it was their Purpose.

We came here to....
We put up with....
Because it was our Purpose.

Plenty of us don't really know yet. Indeed, we may not know until after it's already happened. But just as in Reimagining Evangelism, where Rick Richardson stresses the importance of honing in on our specific spiritual gifts so that we may use them to their fullest potential, we must also follow God into places where we have things to do for him, regardless of what pain or suffering may await us. Which would suck, except we're supposed to rejoice that we should be so worthy as to be persecuted in the name of Jesus (Acts 5:41).

Don't get me wrong here. I'm not making Lawrence out to be some sort of Christ-figure. I'm just pointing him out as an example of the zeal that we should perhaps admire in terms of following Purpose. But he is also a warning. He wanted too much. He wanted to do it all himself. He was prideful. And the weight of taking on the mission almost entirely on his own shoulders led to a form of inner destruction that I can't sufficiently explain - you'd have to watch the movie to get what I'm saying, but I think that eventually it just broke his body, and broke his heart, a little bit too much for him to be effective. He tried to go beyond his Purpose, and then lost himself.

So what am I saying? I often am not sure. But to sum up, we all have a Purpose, and we have to follow it no matter what gets in our way. But we cannot do it without help from God, or we will fall. (I know you're all wondering why I can't just write that at the beginning and save you the trouble of reading everything else. And I don't know the answer. I just do what I do.)

I will definitely have this movie (and all the others I've written about here) at school next year, and would love to share them with whoever is interested. Maybe we can hit up Murphy 116 every now and then, because really, all of them deserve big screen viewing.

Until then though, peace be upon you.